Christian Leadership Alliance

Dealing with Difficult People

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Beyond Date Nights

Leading at home with intentionality while leading your ministry, too
Greg Leith | Outcomes, Jul/Aug 2007

"He planted a witness in Jacob, set his Word firmly in Israel, then commanded our parents to teach it to their children so the next generation would know, and all the generations to come—Know the truth and tell the storiesso their children can trust in God, never forget the works of God but keep his commands to the letter" (Psalm 78:5-7,The Message).

It was late morning on a chilly February weekday and I was home alone. In just a few months, thousands of ministry leaders would gather at "CMA Orlando," where we were calling ministry leaders to re-ignite the passion of their call. My team was deep in preparation and I was bone-tired.

Something was bothering me deep inside. I was preparing to proclaim, through a hundred plus seminars and keynote sessions, that we should lead with intentionality in our ministry worlds. I was busy training the next generation of leaders; the problem was, all of them were at work and none of them lived within the four walls of my house.

I began walking through the rooms of each of my five children. I felt I needed to peer into their worlds to search for clues to reconnect. I'd lost touch somewhat with the future ministry leaders God had entrusted to me right under my nose … my family!

I saw the names of my daughter's friends written on her mirror; the header said, 'pray for' and each friend was listed. She was doing a great job at making prayer a priority. I had no idea she was doing this, nor did I know any of her friends very well. One of my son's rooms had music gear in it and another had the beginnings of beautiful artwork. I was unaware that there was a budding musician and an artist right down the hall from me.

That summer, I began to set up intentional connection times once a week with each of my five kids. I tailored the times to my schedule and their preferences. I was stunned to realize that my oldest daughter and I only had 104 weeks left before she headed for college.

The Lord impressed me to create a Sunday morning coffee-shop time with my 16-year-old daughter Shannon, and we met for two years at Tully's coffee shop. I called my time with Shannon "104 H2H Connect," for the 104 weeks we had left for a 'heart to heart' connection. We talked about everything from boys to the Bible, from apologetics to mission trips. I could now help forge her worldview, as she was heading out on her own.